Chaos

If I wanted to, I could be the guy that sends out Christmas cards before anyone else.

 

The reason I mention it is that we received our first card of the season today. It was from a fellow that Louise used to work with who has moved to Oshawa. Perhaps Christmas comes that much sooner out in Ontario. Perhaps there is an early bird discount on cards mailed more than a month ahead of time. Perhaps these are cards from last year that he is just getting around to mailing out now. Perhaps he decided that this year is the year when HE would be the first of everyone he knows to mail out cards. Perhaps he is one of those “organized” people who just does this kind of thing and doesn’t understand the pressure it puts on others. Perhaps…

 

The one good thing about getting this card is that he beat out Mike and Esther this year. I have stopped wondering why they send cards out so early, I just assume they have nothing better to do with their time. Well, either that or they are organized. Either way it is something of a sickness. Mike and Esther are going to have to up their game next year to beat out Doug. The card challenge is on!

 

I thought about getting my cards done in early November, but it would never have occurred to me to send them out until at least mid December. I mean, what do I do with that card? I haven’t decorated the house yet and there is a very good chance it will be packed away with all of the un-Christmas stuff and not be unearthed until February. Lucky for Doug we don’t worry about how tidy the house is so it can sit on the table for a week or so. Still, sending the card early is pretty thoughtless in a thoughtful kind of way.

 

No, I figure that the Post Office gears up to deal with millions of cards sent in the week or so before Christmas and it just wouldn’t be fair to deny them the challenge of getting every card delivered by Christmas Eve. Everyone works best with a deadline. Early cards are an affront to common sense and an insult to all of the hard working Postal employees across the world.

 

Just think of the ramifications if everyone mailed their cards early. The Post Office wouldn’t need to hire seasonal help to deal with the volume because there wouldn’t be any volume to speak of. Card retailers would need to have the cards in stores earlier and in turn the manufacturers would have to print them up earlier in the year when they should be busy printing whatever it is that they print when not printing cards for Christmas. I can only suppose Valentine cards or Mother’s day cards. Maybe Doug and Mike send out cards for Valentines in December and Mother’s Day cards in March.

 

Why even bother to have specific days at all? I’m not going to blame Doug and Mike for the potential collapse of civilization as we know it, but that is a very real possibility.

 

Maybe I will send my cards out earlier next year, third week in December sounds about right, but I will think about sending them early on in November if I want to…