Drinking the Tea

Last week I was at the dentist for my semi annual check up. They usually fall in and around August and then again just into the New Year. I suspect that the August appointment pays for the summer vacation house on a lake somewhere and the January appointment takes care of Christmas expenses. How much work I need is more than likely directly related to the amount of debt accrued. I am good with that and so it seems is my insurance provider.

 

While the dental hygienist was stabbing my gums with razor sharp tools we were talking about a variety of subjects. Well, she was talking and I was doing the best I could with bleeding gums. I mentioned that our Tiger Lilies had been decimated by the Scarlet lily beetle and according to the City of Calgary website there is little or nothing to be done short of picking the beetles and larva off with my bare hands. That isn’t an option, what if the beetle jumped up my nose or into my ear? I would be dead in three seconds. The hygienist told me that she made a nicotine “tea” and sprayed the plants which seemed to work really well.

 

The recipe is the tobacco from two to four cigarettes, a few drops of oil and a few drops of dish soap.

Of course, I went home and forgot about the conversation until yesterday when I looked at my poor Tiger Lilies. I had found some cigarettes a couple of years ago and kept then in case there is ever a smoker’s emergency in my home. I can’t imagine what the emergency would be, but when I smoked and ran out of cigarettes I wasn’t above ransacking ashtrays for good sized butts. It didn’t have to be my ash tray either, any one would do. I made the tea with the tobacco from four cigarettes and today I strained the mixture and added the other ingredients.

 

Those Scarlet Lily beetles didn’t know what hit them! Dead in fifteen minutes. Well, I suppose that they could be in a nicotine induced coma or maybe it put them to sleep. I don’t even want to consider that it stimulated their sex drive and they are laying on the leaf with a come hither look in their eyes. I am hoping that at the very least they will go thru serious nicotine withdrawal. Let the little bastards suffer.

While I am elated that the “tea” seemed to work really well, I am more than a little worried. You see, I smoked for about thirty years or so and although I have been smoke free for more than a few years, it is a little disconcerting. So far I am still breathing the toxic city air and maybe my tar coated lungs are protecting me from even worse toxins that my pink lunged friends are soon to be suffering from.

 

I should be okay, I don’t remember pouring hot water on my smokes and I have refrained from drinking the tea.