Tonight's Blog

Sometimes when I am rudely woken up from a nap, I will roll onto my stomach and cover my face with my hands. I suppose that I am trying to cling to the warmth and sleep that is quickly escaping. I can feel the cool air attacking my body and the sounds of day to day life are slowly making their way into my consciousness.

I wonder who just called on the phone and if Louise is getting ready to call me. She never would call me, but even after all of these years I still anticipate the call. Maybe I am wondering why Buster just went from deep, rabbit chasing sleep to bat shit crazy barking. That is what I would like him to do if some psychotic killer just forced his way into the house, not when some cat dared to walk up the alley a half block away. Fucking dog!

While I am lying there, trying to force myself back to sleep, I often will see an image on the backs of my eyelids. It is often swirling colours that morph into little figures from one of those psychedelic posters of the sixties. They are insubstantial and I have yet to actually focus on anyone for more than a fleeting moment. That isn’t true, I did manage to watch once, but that was the one time I did acid and I don’t know if I can trust those memories. It was pretty memorable though.

 

I have at times seen flashing lights and often geometric designs will dance across the top of my memory. Today I saw a house. It was the house I live in actually. I remember other houses or cabins and they are generally inviting and warm in appearance. My vision today was my house, but it was my house in the summertime and it was warm and inviting. The focus was on the front door and the rest of the house faded into transparency the farther my eyes went from the door. This is when I generally decide to get up and find out who phoned or why Buster turned into “Barky McBarkington”. I roll over and get on about my life.

Normally I don’t even think about my after waking image, but tonight I was thinking about what I should write in the blog and guess what.

I can’t help but think that I should open one of those doors. It might be very interesting. It could be a direct link to my sub conscious and I would be able to use that access to become the man I have always believed I should be. I might open the door and see a series of random numbers that could change my fortune on the next lottery draw date. I might open the door and find people from my life that are there to advise me and show me love. I might open that door to find how to help mankind finally find the way towards spiritual advancement. I might open that door and find an ending to this life and a beginning of the next. I might open that door and find my way back to sleep.

I might open the door and find tonight’s blog.