I just had a frustrating couple of hours. Most of the time
when I get frustrated, it’s because I am doing something you would consider
stupid and I was doing it incorrectly. This time however, I was trying to do a
very simple fix, well what I thought should be a very simple fix that morphed
into an elaborate production that saw wall hangings fall to the ground, tools
manufactured and the use of language that would make Mayor Rob Ford blush.
It began simply enough with my closing the vertical blinds
in the living room. Well, I would have closed the blinds if something wasn’t
wrong. I tried to close them and when they didn’t close I gave Buster one of
those looks that said “I know that somehow you managed to bugger up the blinds
even though you don’t have thumbs!” He hopped off of the love seat, turned his
ass towards me and left the room. I perched on the arm of the love seat and
tried to see what the problem was. It seems to be that Gordian knot that the
pull cords have become might be the problem.
I untangled the knot and it seems that the knot wasn’t the
problem after all. I fetched a flashlight so I could see inside the track and
pushed my head against the wall. Shit! The cord somehow came off of the pulley,
but that shouldn’t be a tough fix. I’m still saying the same thing two hours later;
it shouldn’t have been a tough fix. Shouldn’t, but was!
I’m not going to bother you with all of the ins and outs,
suffice to say that for some reason I still can’t understand, the cord just
didn’t want to go over the pulley. I suspect there was a lip of some kind that
I never did see which blocked the cord. I fell off of the stool a couple of
times, but lucky for me I was right beside the couch and love seat. Wouldn’t
you know my vertigo would pick this time to act up? I finally managed to get
both pull cords over the pulleys and wouldn’t you know it…I crossed the cords.
SHIT!
I would have thought the cords would come off of the pulley
pretty easy, after all, sometime this afternoon it came off without any help at
all. Not even close! It took about ten minutes and a considerable amount of
swearing to get the damned cords free. I took a five minute break and tried to
stare down the blinds without much success. I blinked first! I had the cords
back in the right place in another twenty minutes or so, and they worked just
fine as if there had never been anything wrong at all. Harrumph!
I put everything back where it belonged and the tiny tools I
manufactured out of wire and metal I will save in the toolbox for when this
happens again. It will happen again because I am convinced that the blinds are possessed
by some malignant spirits. I suppose it might be that they are old and need
replacing or I was doing something stupid and incorrectly. NO…I can’t accept
that…malignant spirits it is.
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