Unsolicited Advice (Part One)

A week or so ago, my daughter registered Hurricane for Kindergarten. It is hard to believe that he will be going to a real school, meeting real friends of his own and making decisions by himself. Oh, I know that he won’t be doing this all at once, but he has begun sliding down that slippery slope. I hope that he does better than I did. I am sure that he will, but you always hope that life goes easy on him and he has the strength to stand up to the challenges that are sure to come his way.

While I was walking the dog today I was thinking what kind of advice I would give him about the world that is soon to be opening up for him. I guess I would be looking at the things in my life that I would tweak given the information that I now possess.

Never slide down anything head first! Your feet and legs can take a lot more punishment that the head and neck.

Now that you have started to read, never stop. Books, the paper or digital kind will always be there for you. They teach you, make you laugh, make you cry and make you the person that you will eventually become.

This won’t apply for a few years, but NEVER play cards or pool with someone named after a city, province or state.

Make sure that you treat your mom and dad with respect, even if you don’t think they deserve it. They are the ones that will always love you.

Never let anyone tell you who you should be. It is really hard, but if you listen to that tiny voice in your head you can’t really go wrong. Well, unless it tells you to kill everyone.

Believe in something bigger than yourself, otherwise none of this makes any sense.

Always wear a seat belt.

Try to put away 10% of everything you make. It is easier if you start and never stop.

If clothing or shoes aren’t comfortable when you buy them, they never will be.

Food shouldn’t EVER look at you from the plate.

Get just enough sleep. Too much makes you fuzzy and too little makes you thick.

Always wear underwear! There will be times that you will lose your pants and underwear will provide you with some dignity.

Listen twice as much as you talk. At least!

Never trust a fart.

 

Don’t waste too much time watching TV

Learn something about auto repair.

A dog is a simple creature that gives you unconditional love and commitment. Don’t own one until you can return unconditional love and commitment.

A woman is a complex creature capable of unconditional love and commitment. Don’t let one own you until you can return unconditional love and commitment.

Find a hobby while you are young. That way you just might get good at it before you get old.

Be your own best friend.

Try not to let birds shit on you. It may be lucky, but I have yet to see that proven.

Learn to play a musical instrument. Well, not the accordion!

 

Remember that “Poppa” loves you.